Looking for the One: a disappointing book that meant to encourage us

 In “Looking for the One” by David McIver, the author tells many stories about interacting with individuals in non-religious settings: planes, trains, automobiles, parks, etc. While the author has many poignant stories admitting wonderful insights from God with regard to whom he should approach and how—and encouraging us to not be timid—I was disappointed that he had no stories about “looking “ for the least or last in our society. McIver never seemed to go outside of his comfort zone. For those hoping to be emboldened to talk to unhoused people, beggars, the foreigners (Lev. 19.34), and any others of a different ethnic or socioeconomic class, this book fails to be role model on how to love “them” as we love ourselves and those in our “tribes.”

Though many of us fear rejection by friends and family, and that hinders us from sharing what we’re learning—even what we’re doubting—and how we’re growing in our faith, we may or may not find it easier to talk to strangers, people we’ll never see again or maintain a long-term relationship with. Many of us might find it easier to talk with those on planes, trains and automobiles because they’ll go away. And if they go away muttering to themselves about our idiocy, we’ll never know and our self-esteem remains intact.

Even so, most of us struggle to talk with people outside our socioeconomic class—whether they be the super-wealthy or the super-poor. We don’t share but a few life experiences. We may not share values or goals or lifestyle choices. We might be in awe of their good fortune (and it is often luck that propelled many for being in the right place at the right time knowing the right people) or we might be fearful we could end up on the streets by being in the wrong place at the wrong time (e.g. an accident that generates high repair or medical bills and leaves us bankrupt).

The title—looking for the one—made me hopeful that I would learn to see the least, the lost and the last in our society and in our world. In counterpoint to McIver’s promptings by the Holy Spirit, I recall a story by Francis Chan. He described going to the beach for some “quiet time” with God. He got his blanket, a latte and a muffin. He felt prompted by the Holy Spirit to answer the questions, “Aren’t you cute sitting here on the beach? Where do you think I [God] am?” He reluctantly admitted that the Holy Spirit was probably downtown amidst all of His greatest, and beloved, creations. Chan’s story prompted me to change my quarterly retreats from a forest setting to a downtown public library setting where I knew many of my unhoused acquaintances hang out to stay warm/cool (depending on the season). Unfortunately, McIver doesn’t venture out his comfort zone; he’s not the role model or pioneer that I hoped to learn from.